God cares for people through people

I visited a patient in Mullingar hospital 25 time over 12 days recently. This entailed three visits to ICU and 22 visits to a ward. There may be more modern equipment and sometimes different procedures today – but there is one thing that has never changed…

That superhuman care given by nurses, doctors, and indeed hospital workers in general, down through the years is beyond words.

Some of the greatest human beings on this earth become nurses and doctors, caring for fellow humans with kindness, compassion and exceptional dedication to their job. Surely nursing has to be the greatest vocation of them all? The empathy that over-worked nurses can muster for every patient is out of this world. Sometimes lip service is directed towards the nursing profession – when what they really deserve is more money and more nurses.

My wife had surgery, which we hadn’t realised was to be major surgery. So, if I sound somewhat sentient in my praise of nurses and doctors – you will understand. And don’t let anybody ever tell me again, ‘you’ll see no doctor over the weekend’. Pamela’s surgeon, Professor Toomey, came to check on her on a Saturday afternoon, while I was visiting. I also saw him checking on a patient on Thursday at 8pm, after doing surgery all day.

The above are given facts, but here I want to highlight what I believe is one of the great aids to healing and happiness which you never hear about. That is the sharing and caring between the patients in a ward. They get strength from talking with each other and somehow their collective vulnerability creates a bond that becomes a strength in aiding recovery. This underscores the case to be made against single room occupancy – apart from when the patient is gravely ill or requires isolation, of course.

Recovering patients in a ward identify with each other, share their woes and exchange family information. Pretty soon, one will know somebody belonging to one of the others. Stories are told, turning to funny incidents, and there new friendships are cemented.

Being in hospital is a traumatic episode, especially, as was the case with Pamela, it involves major surgery. The advantages in mixing with fellow patients are many. You will always find someone worse off than yourself. Sharing with others takes your mind off your situation until, lo and behold, you don’t feel so bad about yourself any more.

After ICU, Pamela arrived in a ward, slotted in between Mary from Mullingar and Sabrina from Granard. Two lovely women… well, now three, you will agree! Soon they could discuss people they all knew, and after two days of that, the biggest danger seemed to be the risk of one of them bursting a stitch from laughter.

When Mary and Sabrina went home, they were replaced by two more delightful Marys… from Castletown Geoghegan and Ballinagore.

Following on from my belief that ward sharing leads to greater contentment, yes… we can use the word ‘happiness.’ Let me give you the greatest example of this that I know of.

My mother was blessed to be able to spend the last happy years of her life in the greatest nursing centre in the country; St Camillus Nursing Centre, Killucan.

For the first two years of Mammy’s residency, she shared a room with four other women. The friendships that developed among those residents were probably the strongest I have ever observed in my lifetime. People, on the last leg of life, showing totally unselfish care for their roommates. Not only that, but Annie, Mary, Betty, Doreen, Martha and others turned all the visiting family members into friends with each other.

One Sunday, Mary’s family arrived to take their mother home for Sunday dinner – which naturally, was the highlight of Mary’s week. “I’m not going home today,” Mary announced. “Betty isn’t well” – and Mary, despite being dressed in her Sunday best for the road, would not budge. She would not leave her sick friend. Think about that one… the ones with the least, giving the most.

When Martha lost a son and cried at night into her pillow, Annie, in the bed next to her, cried along with her. Someone told me one time that ‘God cares for people through people’. Room 22 in the Camillians and the nurses I encountered last week showed me how true that is.

Things changed and HIQA decreed that every nursing home resident should have a private room to themselves. Does that not compound a loneliness and isolation problem – especially for residents with few visitors, or whose family lives a distance away? I can see the reasoning behind the rule… and all I will say about it is that while HIQA has been making rules for the betterment of nursing homes for the past 17 years, the nursing order of Saint Camillus has been doing it for 300 years – and so, they too must know something.

The Camillians and other top nursing orders know what is best for their residents and should be allowed some flexibility, especially where residents themselves wish to room together.

Don’t Forget

A happy frame of mind holds the picture of health.