Kilbeggan Men’s Shed shows dementia no bar to active participation in hobbies

Kindness and tact by the members of one of Westmeath’s Men’s Sheds meant that a local man suffering from dementia still got to have a social outlet and still got to pursue his passion for music, even as the cruel disease claimed more and more of his memories and personality.

A builder by trade, Seán Gallagher of Kilbeggan was a gifted musician who played professionally, but when diagnosed with dementia, he gradually found his world shrinking: he was becoming socially isolated.

"It was Seán’s wife Mary who got in touch with us," says TP O’Gorman of the Kilbeggan Men’s Shed.

"Mary explained that he was having problems in terms of memory, recall, and all sorts of stuff like that.

"She let me know that he was in early stage dementia.

"He was quite fine in a fashion but she let me know exactly what way the situation was, and told me about the strategies that she was using with him at home to help him."

TP – and indeed many of the other men – knew Sean well, and were more than happy to have him attend: "We’d known him in a previous life and then we were getting to know him in a new fashion, if you like, in terms of with dementia," says TP.

He stresses that Seán was seen as an asset to the organisation: "Because I had known him and knew the kind of man he was, I said ‘absolutely yeah; when Mary asked about him joining and I suppose part of it was I knew he was going to be of benefit to the shed because he was so musical, so gifted. I was over the moon: I was delighted. There was a positive side to this and the positive side was that someone was coming to the shed with this musical gift that could enhance our shed."

At that stage, Seán’s dementia wasn’t severe: nonetheless, as Mary would prepare him for his weekly visit, ensuring he had his instruments so he could jam with the other musicians among the membership of Kilbeggan Men’s Shed, Seán would insist on bringing all his amplification equipment with him.

"He actually thought he was going to a gig," says TP. "And while he was in a way going to a gig, it was a different type of gig!"

Considerately, the members would bring the equipment in for him, even though they knew it was not needed.

TP and some of the other members had knowledge of how dementia can affect people, so they made sure Seán was allowed the time he needed; that he was never put under any pressure.

"He blended in really well because we had four or five musicians already."

Sadly, the members could see Seán’s condition worsening gradually: "You could see he had difficulty in remembering the words of songs; he would have difficulty in tuning the instruments."

Eventually, Sean’s physical health disimproved, and in February of this year he died, to the great sadness of all.

The Shed has lost seven members to death in the last four years. "We have gained a few new men but, like, COVID really has put the kibosh on the whole thing for us," says TP.

Prior to Covid, the Men’s Shed, which operates out of a premises on the Clara Road, and which has been running in Kilbeggan since 2014, would typically have around twenty at its meetings.

There was something to appeal to all members: some opted to play music; others preferred to take part in carpentry; others enjoyed working in the polytunnel, and there were also facilities there for those who enjoy baking. But once it came to the tea break, everyone would stop what they were doing and get together for a catch-up.

"We are not meeting at the moment but we are in the throes of being in ‘make your mind up’ time, in the sense that we haven't been meeting but we've been in contact in various bits and pieces of ways between WhatsApp and zoom and phonecalls – but it is a poor substitute for meeting," says TP.

There is light at the end of the tunnel in that hospitality has re-opened, and some men’s sheds have reopened "on a minor scale" and TP says the Kilbeggan branch is constantly in touch with the national organisation.